Archive for the ‘Parenting is funny’ Category

Ol’ What’s-His-Name

January 10th, 2015 Comments off

The night before Thanksgiving my sister took her daughter to New York City to watch the balloons being blown up for the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. On the way to the city her four-year-old asked, “Mommy, do those balloons go all the way up to that ‘Church Guy?'”

“You mean God?”

“Yeah, him!”

Read more funny parenting stories here.


Print Friendly

Does this caterpillar make me look fat?

December 31st, 2014 Comments off

A while back we got one of those butterfly growing kits that you start from caterpillars. There were the same number of caterpillars as members of the family, so the children named each one after us. I was a little distraught when I heard one child declare, “The big one is Mommy.” But I felt a little better later on when I heard one say, “The caterpillar with its head in the food is Daddy.”

Sounds like that caterpillar had a rough night.

Read more funny parenting stories.

Print Friendly

Kids are funny

December 19th, 2014 Comments off

The girls were looking at their baby albums. My middle daughter, the most dramatic of the bunch by far, announced in a grandiose voice, “It’s time for the tale of the babies! Part One: Baby Gemma grows up!”

Also while looking at their pictures they saw their favorite stuffed animals when they were brand new. “Look how young Momma Bear and Ribbity are! Momma Bear was so fluffy back then.” I couldn’t help but laugh. They sounded like me when I look at pictures of my husband and myself from long ago. We were both much fluffier then.

Read more funny parenting stories.

Print Friendly

Parents say the darndest things

December 12th, 2014 Comments off

The other morning our son climbed in bed with us and asked my husband, “How come your armpits are so furry?”  My husband replied, “I ate a monster! When you get older you will eat a monster and get furry, too.” Then my son said, “Grandpa must have eaten a lot of monsters!”

Nicole, mother of 8

Read more funny parenting stories.

Print Friendly

As if there were any doubt…

December 5th, 2014 Comments off

More Proof that My Oldest Daughter is Truly My Child:

I was listening to one of my favorite songs when she wandered over and said, “I like this song. It attracted me the way an introductory paragraph should.”

Ah, my darling nerd. How I love you!

Read more funny parenting stories here.



Print Friendly

Donut hands

November 22nd, 2014 Comments off

Some churches provide donuts after Mass for parishioners to munch while they mingle. This is a great bribery tool for parents who want their children to behave well at church. One son drew his Mother’s attention to his folded hands during Mass, saying “Look, Mom, donut hands!”

And here’s a little something from a friend of mine who teaches religion. This is CLASSIC!

I had my students do a journal entry for Isaac when he was going to be sacrificed by Abraham. Here is the end of one girl’s entry:
“….We sacrificed a ram instead. Then we went home, and as we were walking, my father said to me, more

Print Friendly

Kids say the funniest things

November 14th, 2014 Comments off

My four-year-old daughter was so excited that I put bubbles in the bathtub she said, “I’m so happy I could just scream like a little girl!” Thank you for saying so rather than doing so.

Another time she asked my husband, “Dad, did Jesus make your hair very small?” She’d never seen him getting a hair cut, nor seemed to notice every time it was shorter, so it seemed a valid question.

My seven-year-old daughter was making mistakes with her math worksheet. She wasn’t paying attention to whether or not it was an addition or subtraction problem, as it kept changing on her. I said, “Pay attention to the symbol. The symbol is key.”

She responded in a flowy voice: Read more…

Print Friendly

A statement made in households the world over

November 8th, 2014 Comments off

My seven-year-old caught me on Facebook when I was supposed to be helping the kids with their night-time routine.  She proceeded to scold me: “Mom, you better get off that computer ’cause that won’t put us to bed!”

She was so right.

-Anne, mother of 5

Read more funny parenting stories.

Print Friendly

So close…

October 31st, 2014 Comments off

I’m trying my hand at novel writing. My oldest is eager to read my book. I’ve caught her a couple of times trying to read over my shoulder as I type, but I’ve told her she’s too young for it. At dinner she asked, “Can I just read the parts that I’m not too young for?” I said she can read it when it’s published. She’ll probably have children of her own by then, so it should be all good.

Then my seven-year-old said, “Maybe your book will be made into a movie.”

“That would be great!” I said, impressed that she was looking out for the success of her momma.

But then she added, Read more…

Print Friendly

The laundry gods are smiling upon me

October 24th, 2014 Comments off

Perhaps they’re just pleased that I’m finally washing all those clothes.

Here’s my laundry method. There’s a reason I’m spelling it out for you. Wait for iiiiiiiittttt!

1. Procrastinate until laundry basket is full to overflowing.

2. Pick up scattered articles of clothing that have fallen off the laundry heap and shove them back in the basket. Read more…

Print Friendly